For years, I thought everyone else needed to change. I can remember back in 2002 reading Dr. Phil McGraw’s book, Relationship Rescue. I needed a relationship rescue in a serious way at the time so the book came in handy. That was the first time it sunk in for me that I NEEDED to change. Blaming someone else wasn’t the answer and I was not a victim.
I was still in my 20’s, very late 20’s, just had my second child and thought ok, let me work on this. I CHANGE. I read that I needed to change my reaction to get a different response. SO, that I did! It WORKED! The relationship I was focused on changing, was changing because I was changing, it was good!!
BUT, it was short lived and it didn’t last long. Eventually I went back to my old behaviors and experienced the same old responses to my same old reactions. BUMMER!!
I STILL believe the LAW OF CHANGE:
Nobody can change YOU (why? Because your brain ONLY listens to YOU)
YOU canNOT change others (why? Because they only listen to themselves)
YOU can ONLY change yourself (why? Because YOU only listen to YOU)
As YOU change, those around you change as a reaction to all of the changes in YOU!
THAT is where I am today, in my late 30’s – it took me just shy of 10 years to get this change thing down AND I’m STILL working on it! The difference today, than where I was when it first hit me, is I AM INTENTIONAL about MY CHANGE.
I’m focused on where I want to BE. Where I’m headed. The Goal. I’ve experienced growth in MANY areas of my life discovering what I want. need. think. feel. FINALLY!! The only way to get to the goal is for me to CHANGE. The “drive-thru” mentality that many people have, even me at times, doesn’t work with change. It’s a process, it takes time and to sustain the changes, I need to be intentional about it by equipping myself.
Some people FEAR change and believe that it is bad, not me, I’m all about change! Bring it on. Where are you at with change? Is it something you fear? Something you think others need to do? OR Is it for you? If so, how will you sustain it? How can you be intentional to get to where you’re going?