Alter-Ego, Meet Mine

After talking this over with several friends, I realized that I’m not alone on this topic, SO I thought I would share a fun way……OK maybe it’s not FUN, BUT it is a ‘not so serious’ way to deal with our negative self talk, selfishness, poisonous pride, deceiving thoughts, resentments, and our larger than LARGE ego that needs to be tamed and managed.

Just like most things that make their way into our lives, if we acknowledge them, call them out, identify what they are we have a better chance of dealing with them and managing the situation. When we’ve got our blinders on or if we are unwilling to take an honest look at ourselves, a few things could happen.  We can slowly lose joy, get stuck in ruts, and start to place blame where it does NOT belong.

Let me introduce to you Towanda.  Towanda has been with me since I was born.  We grew up together, experienced life together, faced challenges together, and even lived together.  The funny things is………I didn’t really KNOW her until recently.  Once I got to know her?  Well, I decided I did NOT like her AT ALL!!   She is negative, controlling, manipulative, insecure, resentful, selfish, insensitive, judgmental, and angry.  LOVELY, wouldn’t you say?!?!?  NOT!!  Here’s the kicker about Towanda; Towanda is ME.

YES, Towanda is the name I have given all my MY “character defects”.  Before I continue, I have to say this.  If your name is Towanda and you’re reading this, PLEASE do NOT take offense.  I grabbed the name from a scene that I remembered from the movie Fried Green Tomatoes.  Actress Kathy Bates plays the character Evelyn Couch and gives her alter-ego this name.  You can watch the Towanda clip if you’d like, it’s pretty funny!  With that said, If you’d like to name your character defects “Teri” go right ahead, I won’t take offense.  LOL

I was FINALLY able to see Towanda when God revealed her to me in February 2010.  It was a love/hate experience.  I thought that I had already surrendered MY will or should I say Towanda’s, BUT I had not.  I was still in the drivers seat, trying to maintain the wheel.  It took me 36 years to get to this point of being able to identify Towanda.  I’m confident that many people in my world had met her before I was able to, but I’m grateful that I FINALLY did……even though it was a painful realization.

Our first meeting was tough, I cried when I met her.  I couldn’t believe I had let her live with me for that long with out doing something about it.  It has been a slow process grasping ALL of her character defects, but God continues to reveal to me more of Towanda as I grow in my faith and my walk with Him.

If you’re perfect.  Not needing to change anything in your life, you can stop reading hear.  BUT, if you’ve got some areas in your life that need improvement, or have identified some character defects, like me, you will want to read Part two of this post on Thursday.  There I will walk you though the steps that I took to giving ‘it’ a name and explain what to do when your new found unwanted friend is triggered and wakes up!

You can read Part two by following this link.

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